Wedding advanced by a day !

The latest update , and from a guy you can only expect factual info . Though honestly I love being privy to what all goes in a women's mind prior to her getting married . Will defn be useful when I need to know !

Anyways the wedding is now on the 27th December and not 28th . So all of you replan.
And in terms of the look , i really like the pink one . Think dee will look good in something like that but obv you all know better what would suit her.

More Choices - Let the voting begin

Click on image to make it bigger.

The Mallu Saree Look















Awesome Green Gold Look















Red and Blue Look Great














All Silver















All Gold

















All White















All Black















Ghagra

Deena makes the cover!

Vote for your favorite outfit

Ok, here are some choices on wedding wear: engagement/ reception. Thank you Tanu for the supah options. Have fallen in love with Manish Arora- please check out his website: www.manisharora.ws. His brand is called Fishfry.

My personal favorites are the black & gold and the pink saree with kamasutra blouse.

Updates

Card:
Karan has been briefed. Kavita has very sweetly agreed to write copy. Karan will show me a layout next week Tuesday, as he is off to Mumbai on some work. In the meanwhile, will go and scout for some nice paper.

Colors:
I’m really stumped here and need help. Need some suggestions on what the color theme should be. I’m dangerously veering towards an all white theme for lack of ideas.

Clothes:
What to wear? What to wear? What to wear? A few ideas, floating about – a 40’s look in white and silver with a large white flower on head. Blouse will be dig-jag, sleeveless, with a low cut back. Or a traditional mallu ‘set-mundu’ with jewellery to match.

Planning on going shopping with my fashion consultant Kavita this week.

That’s all for this week.

Sound Advice

Ever since I announced the 'hitch plan' to friends and family, I've been receiving a lot of sound advice. Most of them funny, owing (OFCOURSE) to my inexperience but all of them effective (it seems) coming from dear friends who seem to have 'cracked the code'.

1. Do not make faces in wedding photographs.
Looking back you'll regret the fact that you don’t have a single photo (where both of you do not look like baby chimps on helium) that your parents can display at home

2. Always opt to go away on a honeymoon
It is NOT a cheesy thing to do. Apparently it helps in bond building and not the same as going away on illegal vacations together when you were single. Oh, and treks, rock climbing do not count.

3. Egg on Face
Beat egg whites into stiff peaks. Smear on face. Place face in oven for 15 min and bake at 100 deg. (hehehe...) But truly, egg whites smeared everyday, help to tighten skin and improve skin tone. Nepali women do this for a year before their wedding and that’s the secret of their glowing complexion.

4. First non-mover advantage
If you DONT do the things that you would normally do (like make tea and walk the dog), during the first few months of getting married, your significant other will do it out of courtesy for you. Apparently men are in the 'mode to please' which comes with an expiry period of 6 months. Make most use of this time to get them to do what you hate doing yourself.

5. Dress rehearsal
Once your clothes are ready, pick a day where you think you look your best. Put on some make up that you would on your wedding day and ask a professional photographer to take some nice photos of you in it. This you can slyly pass off as Beautiful Bride photographs, if all you have are Helium Chimp smiles and Fish eye (very likely in my case) Bride pictures.

6. Art direct your wedding
Colour co-ordinate the decorations on the mandap/ stage with your wedding outfit. Visualizations skills will help at this point in time. If you lack them, it is better to get an art director friend to help you out. Other wise, you might have a minor mishap on your hands, where if not executed properly, you might end up looking like part of the decor. It is not important to color co-ordinate the groom.

7. Your money is your money. His money is your money too
No prizes for guessing that this could only come from The Mother. Good advice which I intend to fully execute.

And last (which also happens to be my favorite)

8. Be kind to each other
Shit happens. All the time. Dog poop included. It’s important to have a kind word to say to each other at the end of the day.

Waiting for more good advice. They really help brighten up my day.

The fukitol pill

Its finally happening (I think). After a lot of deliberation, threats (by The Mother), threats (by me- I will see 'other men'), Kurian and I are getting married. Rather than feeling violins in the background and the proverbial zooming out of final frame into a heart shape before the credits roll, I'm feeling stressed.

Since May, (when the proposal* happened)- I've had to battle The Mother on issues like how we will live (given our meager salaries and extravagant lifestyles), where will we live, my dogs will have to move with me (hmm...), what will I wear (a saree) and what will K wear (A jubba - Sorrow!!! now no Goan wedding with a gown- but a Son-in-law in an 'Indian dress' God forbid!).

September- The Mother has been pacified. She's even excited enough to install a new kitchen, paint the house and redo the flooring. But I'm battling an entirely new set of problems. Me.

Do I really want to? Really really want to?

Illustrating with example 1

Things were going smooth enough. K and I went to watch 'The Devil wears Prada' (which is a good movie- visit the peanut gallery for reviews). Then K excitedly points out to this woman 3 rows below and extols the virtues of her beauty. Hmmm....which is also fine, until he proclaimed this THRICE and we had to follow her out the exit to get 'a better view'.

Alarm bells screaming:

a) Is he having second thoughts? I shouldn’t have arm twisted?
b) But Femina and Cosmo said that my Biological clock was ticking...and at the rate we were going, I'd have babies when I was 40...
c) Maybe he didn’t really want to...the arm twisting must have hurt...Talwakars must be paying off...
d) What if we were to get married- and THEN I catch him having an affair? What then? Ohmygod! ohmygod! ohmygod! I'm not attractive!
e) Guilt.
Illustrating with example 2

Same movie night. On the way home drive. K's generally talking about Monsters Ball. Good movie...Have I watched it (no)...Have I seen Halle Berry in it (no- why?) Oh there’s this nude scene....awesome (mildly interested...hmmm) there’s something soooo wonderfully magnificent about a naked woman’s body- Halle Berry, Meg Rayan (in The cut) ....(alarm bells going off again)...K's going on, seemingly oblivious to my discomfort.

Sulky silence.

a) That’s twice in one evening. I think he IS having second thoughts
b) Am I marrying a perve? Is he hinting at threesomes?
c) Threesomes (mild interest)....but I'm sure it'll have to be another woman (Chee...cheee, erase all bad thoughts)

Spoke with Kavi and Jesh the next day and asked if I over reacted. Being the loyal friends they were- Noooo!!! They also told me that Halle Berry has droopy boobs in Monsters Ball (I don’t know if she has droopy boobs otherwise).

d) K LIKES droopy boobs? That it?
e) I don’t have droopy boobs. Do I want droopy boobs?
f) I give up on reason. Need to give tit for tat (no pun intended)
g) Chalk out interesting plan where I will watch all movies with naked men in them and then casually slip comments like - did you see The Monster? Good movie. Johnny (Depp, not...) was sooooo cool. He had the hottest... whatever!!
h) Jesh and Kartik are immediately given assignments to watch such movies over the weekend and give me 'details'. Feeling very pleased with my POA.

Illustrating with example 3

Another day at work. It’s September. Was thinking that I need to start planning 'The Event" and I have no idea where to start. Felt a wave of self pity and immediately called out to Jesh for empathy. We were discussing the things to do:

i. Design Invite
ii. Decide on colours
iii. Freeze guest list
iv. Venue?
v. Caterers?
vi. Clothes - what should I wear?

Never ask a guy this. Jesh was sweet enough to try and help. He said just pick my favorite color. I said red. RED?? No. Too loud, garish. So we're back to 'what to wear?'

Then, tra-la-la, a very sweet colleague walks into our discussion. You haven’t planned yet??! My wedding was an event I planned for a year!! Its September girl!! What are you doing about your skin and hair?

SKIN & HAIR! I want to burst into tears.

vii. Skin and hair treatments (Jesh is trying to be consoling- At least I don’t have to lose weight)

Illustrating with example 4

Went out to the popular watering hole last night. I drove. Minor skirmish with K cause he didn’t want to go. Conned him into coming by inviting his best friend (humprhhhh...). Other than that all going well. Until I found myself in the middle of a full scale brawl. I'm stuck between the bad guy (stupid bull) and good guy and glance anxiously towards K. Maybe now, he'll step in and save me. My hero!

K's nursing his drink and looking in on at the proceedings. I'm sure he can see me stuck between Stupid Bull and the bar. No hero. The great save happens much later on by K's best friend (double humprhhh!)

K goes back home with best friend because he hungry. Completely oblivious as usual.

Alarm Bells:

a) See? He is having second thoughts...
b) Is he gay?
c) Is this behavior inkling to what our lives are going to be together? Where is the 'rock you can count on?'. It gently dawns on me that the roles have been reversed. I have visions of myself saving K from brawls, driving him to work and parties. Sniff. Self pity thou art be banished.

The good night call got blown out of proportion, as a few choice expletives were exchanged. Sat up till 3 am packing away all the gifts gotten over a period of 4 years, add a heartfelt letter (suffer!) and resolved NEVER to fall in love, get married. And only have dogs for company. And I’ll start watching porn for other company.

Drop off the parcel with K's watchman and spend the rest of the day at work. In misery.

Someone told me, the best way to review any situation is with indifference or humor. I resolve to do the latter. And take the Fukitol pill. My friend Tanya is sending me a big bottle of that from San Francisco.

* Proposal- Arm twisting and holding a May 15th. deadline over K's head